Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Seeking Fulfillment

So the last few weeks I’ve been talking about ways to better organize your life. I’ve been obsessed with this in my own life because I’ve felt overwhelmed with the list of things I needed to do to get to this undefined place where I would finally feel fulfilled. I wasn’t aware that this was my ultimate goal… I thought I bought into the idea that life is about goal achievement and once you accomplish one goal, you just set another one and so on and so forth. So when I first started feeling anxiety about my list, I thought I just wasn’t going about it in the right way. I thought maybe I just wasn’t committed enough. If I could learn the secrets of other successful people, perhaps I could master the focus to accomplish all of my goals and become just as successful. And I did learn some great new techniques and these techniques did help. David Allen’s central theme in particular was a kind of breakthrough in my goal setting.

But there was still something missing. I couldn’t define it. This anxiety, this weight kept tugging at my heart. What was it all for? What were these goals driving me toward? I thought I would be happy with each goal accomplished just for the sake of accomplishing something. But what happened instead was this momentary high followed by deep anxiety about needing to set my next goal. Was this really what I wanted from life? I wasn’t really happy. Actually, I was sort of miserable.

Then I started to listen to Eckhart Tolle’s Bringing Stillness into Everyday Life and I had an “Aha” moment. Now, I’ve read and listened to a lot of advice about mindfulness and living in the present moment. But Eckhart Tolle’s teachings take this concept to a whole new level. He talks about many things in this program, but I wanted to highlight just a couple of his thoughts. He says people are always trying to get to this future moment that will somehow make their lives better. We call this progress. But actions that arise out of suffering or anger will just bring about more suffering and anger. This is why the world at large is suffering. Most people are lost in the content of life and if you are lost in the content of life you will never be fulfilled because it is a bottomless pit… always wanting more content. His program really made me stop and think about my life and goals in a profound way. There is a lot to examine here and a lot to write about. I will certainly return to this topic in a future post.

Do you have a good “Aha” moment you would like to share with us? Please leave a comment below.

1 comment:

5pdhyp said...

This reminds me of a comment made by Jamie Smart (another NLP Trainer). He said that if a goal you plan on setting isn't going to change your life RIGHT NOW, it isn't worth doing. The way most people set goals is to say, "When I have 'X', I'll be happy." And the truth is, you could be happy right now, no matter what your current situation in life is. So, what are goals good for? Goals (in NLP, we call them 'outcomes') are for changing your life for the better, for the sake of yourself and those around you. Not, however, for 'feeling good.' If for some reason someone doesn't feel like their life is satisfying, it's likely that they have made a limiting decision (ad thus have a limiting belief) about how satisfied they will let themselves feel about their life. If this is the case, seek out an NLP, Time Line Therapy(R), or EFT coach. We have a number of resources for changing belief patterns and transforming lives. All anxiety, fear, depression, guilt, anger, and even limiting beliefs, are just processes done by the unconscious mind, and can be changed with a two day breakthrough. It make take someone by themselves 30 days to make or break a habit, but it takes an NLP coach about 5-10 minutes (literally).
If you would like more information, my email is; shawn(@)